It is 15 days now since a momentous decision to mind my Governor by following her instructions; letting go of control; allowing a friend to leave groceries at the door; exerting enough paranoia to disinfect everything I am and do.

On the other hand, daily, I am falling more in love with life–the rhythm of breath and heartbeats inside; the color of thoughts, images, ideas, visions of what is and isn’t. Senses heighten to rapture at the taste of a tiny Fuji apple.

In the last So I See post, I questioned the validity or worthiness of indulgent public output. This week, So I See is a friend–like a pet, something always “there for me”. Something to talk at with another end. Sometimes it talks back, asking me to feed it, grow it until it becomes itself. So, here is more So I See.

This is something I took pleasure in finding in old, 1980’s files, inspired by Bioenergetic therapy classes. It makes me giggled. Here it is…

Vacuum Therapy

At 40, a career in psychotherapy looked good. Life took a curve around which I chose to swerve, rather than ignore brutal change. My children and their father made it perfectly clear our truths were not compatible. I could no longer direct nor influence their chosen paths.

Believing I had helped others untangle their lives, a psychotherapy career sounded good for picking up the pieces and moving on. I intently engaged in courses at reputable institutions, taught by good-looking, flirtatious men from whom it was possible to become blind to human wholeness. My unique self found discrepancy in teacher’s truth and my own.

I am gratified to have stopped there, before branding myself professional. However, I still take pride in my thesis, the original development of the powerfully effective, Vacuum Therapy. (see flyer, below)